Happy one year Lollicup(:

First woke up early in the morning for church.
I was there for the whole morning (: i feel blessed lol.
Then met up with thee cousins and kuya Marick at thee mall.
Kinda looked around forever 21 for a while,
i saw this cute shirt >.< but didnt buy it. (sigh) -- had to go.

The whole day i was waiting for this, going to Lollicup.
[eventhough i went there yesterday with Bat hehe]
One because i get to see the mc(ste7en) && i want a shirt lol.
But i wasnt the first 100customer, darn johnny. lmao kidding.
ish all gewd -- the workers were having a hard time learning my name.
Chilled there for a while; talked laughed and all that shizz.
Said byee to everyone, gave last hug to ste7en and got me shirt.
I know i didnt win, but i am a VALUABLE CUSTOMER haha.


went to target for fun, then costco.
unplanned and random day(: but i liked it<3

What chu talking about!?

kevin r: you wanna die?
me: sometimes
kevin r.: what?! that was a good answer, it made me think and got all confused.
LMAO. (the day we got free starbucks)



aim conversation
PrINChArMIN pnoi: Yup..what are you studying? Boyfriendcology? Haha
renabobena10: lol i failed that twice
renabobena10: ahhaha
renabobena10: im taking single and not looking class.(:
PrINChArMIN pnoi: Hahaha
PrINChArMIN pnoi: Your a boyfriend drop out
renabobena10: hahaha. thats funnie.

Just one of those days

KUYA RONNIE: so who do you like?
ME: why do you want to know -_-
KUYA RONNIE: because i'm your big brother, i want to be there for you.
ME: so like if i want you to beat someone up for me because they hurt me so much would you do it? since you are like my big brother and all.
KUYA RONNIE: yes
ME: omg really?
KUYA RONNIE: well you have to have a good reason.
ME: awhh, you suck... nevermind (LOL)

Another Friday that was pretty fun. Hung out with my Kuya Ronnie. Bumped the power ranger song in the car(: you know! hahah. We went to Lollicup and met ste7en who plays GREAT guitar and sings really good. he likes request lol(: then we left to the mall and saw jony and i met kyrie for the first time. i saw this shirt at urban that had a huge heart and said tokyo on the bottom it was pretty cute, and see through lol(: we took pictures at the apple store...

You got a friend in me.

Eddie Yummie Banana Pineapple aka Yellow Pina

That is the name of my very best friend. Despite of our arrangement of not seeing each other everyday like in high school we still have the time to call each other. Whatever situation it is, we are always there for each other… well he’s mostly there for me, I have more problems lol(: I know he doesn’t give much feedback, and I know I talk a lot -- but we have a great relationship. I can’t believe that I just met him two years ago, and it feels like I have known him forever.

Finding out that he’s going to Fresno Pacific, I am super happy for him. That is one of the best schools in Fresno and he deserves to get a great education. The only thing that sucks is he’s not gonna be at state with me. All I have to do is hope for the best for him, he’s a great guy and I think he’s going to do great in the future.

Well we had our normal conversations, but we started out with me expressing like crazzie. He was kinda speechless, but who wouldn’t be when all I can say is “guys are jerks”. I don’t really mean that -- but I didn’t know how to put it really. Anyways, he made me understand other things that kinda relate to my situation. He made put myself in someone else’s position, how I would feel if I were them. And he asked some questions that I recognized that I studdered in. Why cant I answer a simple question? Because the answer wasn’t simple as I thought, meaning I couldn’t answer something that I truly thought that was right, or true. And another thing is being a pessimist. I thought being one was always negative, but he made me realize it really wasn’t. The deal is it’s better to be a pessimist and think the bad things can happen so you won’t get discouraged when it does, because you expected the unexpected. Then you are “happy happy happy” -- yeah we exaggerated on that.

It’s the way we talk to each other. It’s not the same with others, I don’t do the usual routine conversations like “how’s your day, blah blah blah”. We put what is out there, we talk like we have a reason to. And we make each conversation worth it like the last one. It’s just different with him. I said he was like my little brother that is taller than me, this kind of relationship is something I never want to lose. I hope everyone has a person like this, because they are worth every second of your time.

A day I dont want to remember.

I woke up one in the morning to be on myspace and talk to my peoples on aim and msn. I know it sounds really lame, but I couldn't fall asleep. My conversations went on -- and it doesn't end well. How am i feeling? Well, I'm not mad... I'm just sick && tired. I'm sick of crying over spilt milk, I'm tired of not expecting the unexpected. I put my hopes so high, so I can see it crash all down. I didn't want anyone to cheer me up, I didn't want to laugh or smile. I just wanted someone to listen to me, and let me cry. Let me be.

My friend Bat, that I barely met a couple months ago helped me out. He was listening when I just complained and whined. He related to me, so I can understand what's happening. He told me I was blindsighted. He showed me what I couldn't see. He made me look at it as an opportunity to learn. It's not because I liked the attention that someone was listening to me, when no one else was there. It's the fact that I have the trust in him to keep this, and respect what I have to say. Does he care -- well i believe yes. It's not because he didn't leave when i poured my heart out, it's not because he was there when no one else was there to listen to me, it's because he knows how I feel. You can't relate to a person until you have experienced the same thing.

On the other hand Leo helped me with another situation. The situation of looking at someone, when I thought it was something more. I couldn't figure out myself; but it shows that I just missed that person who was always there to fix and broken heart. He made me understand that; and well... I took his word for it. But last night was the night I just wanted to hold that other persons hand and hear his voice say again that "everything will be alright", he never backed down on saying that.

I spent my day with only three hours of sleep, waking up in the morning crying and sleeping with tears running down my face. So I start blogging on blogspot with something that impacts me so much. Let's call this the learning experience. What I learned is not everyone is what you expect to be, and listen to what others have to say -- cause most of the time... they're right. They see what you can't see. It sucks when it's too late. People have wants and needs; and when you don't meet their expectations... it doesn't cut it for them. And this shows once again -- i'm not good enough. But it shows; that i deserve better. So here's my first blog, now you know more about me, CONGRATS. i guess.