Seriously. -- venting

this chick got problems.
accusing me of something, when she doesnt even know the facts.
she's just stupid to say that she has the problem with me.
she makes up retarded reasons so people won't think she is a bad person.
like seriously, wtf. suck it up girl -- and get a life.
and stop playing with my friends,
trying to act hard on myspace, and make yourself look better.
but the only thing you are is a drama starter.
stop acting dumb -- i wanna punch her in the face lol.

Update

what i need to accomplish for this year.
-- kinda sums up some of the things i have.

0. hang out with ANGEL HUERTO(: LOL
1. finish spring 2009 semester
2. summer 2009 school at fresno city
3. try all the flavors at lollicup
4. go to disneyland/universal studios with the cousins
5. visit jilliane's sushi shop
6. get anthonylo's skittles lol. green ones right?
7. hang out with my boy ste7en.
8. summer roadtrips?
9. summer adventures with the friends
10. redecorate my room
11. make a music video with michael and his friends
12. be a sophomore already in college (30 units)
13. go to central's graduation (class of 2009)
14. go to buchanan's graduations
15. my birthday weekend(: thursday-sunday
16. get a job!
17. make more youtube videos.
18. visit the williams family in sacramento
19. take pretty pictures everyday
20. save money to get something BIG(: lol
21. a boyfriend. hhaha kidding, its called being independent(:
22. see my best friends bby coming in june.
23. watch lots of videos
24. cook an entire dinner
25. teach my bunnie a trick
26. excercise? ahha nvm
27. prank call fun
28. try to win something from the radio station
29. contacts in glasses out
30. braces off! (:
31. new hairstyle, dye it maybe
32. meet more new cool people
33. go up to the cute guy in my poly sci class >.<
34. try not to miss class in fall 2009 classes


... prob add more.
**tell me if i missed ne thing.

Keep My Mouth Shut!

something i need to do.
dont trust anybody.



...geez, see what happened.

What do I do

When one of your friends are making a big mistake.
But it makes them real happy.


what to do -_-"
HELP.

Shiet Happens.

Once upon a time, the world sucked and
nothing in it ever seemed to be good
and then one day you find this person
someone great, and they get you through
your days and make the world not so bad.
Then another day down the road
this great person that brought you
so much happiness just slams a brick
in your face and the world once again
is the worst place to be

update(:

wow, i haven't update this in a long time. so here's some stuff that has been happening to me lately. read if you are bored, or just really interested in my life(:

well lately i've been hanging out with my boyfriend and girlfriend lately. lol who are they? george and patricia, the two best friends a girl could ever had. lol, our favorite thing to do together is eat. seriously... lol we have our fun and random moments, but usually we end up just being hungry and eat. it's funnie; we have our jack in the box tacos, can i have (TWO) donuts -- inside joke, sonic's happy hour(: , oh and we can never eat in front of eachother. its impossible to finish our food. except me, cuhz im cool like that(:

there's this fool name michael. dengg i barely met him in feb and he is hella stalker status i swear. nah we just joke around. and he's gay, i think that's true(: anyways... he always gives me white cheddar cheeze its (which now i have an obsession with) and takes me to lollicup to hang lol, since he's always there anyways. but enough about him haha.

so update on me. signing up on classes for next sem and summer school this month. im in spring break, and didnt do anything that exciting. but im booked for the next three weekends; and have double booked stuff -_-" iono what to do. and like im happy right now. life is going at its ease. so much to do though. like almost one more month til school is over? im hella trying to get a job. spent a whole day about it. oh and its hectic with relationships between people. so serious; im not gonna talk about it! ahahha peace nikkuhs

Ste7en's Words of Wisdom

ch- ch- check it out!
_updated frequently

03/04"i find power within myself to over come my problems and fear, which makes me feel alot stronger"

03/04"within my life journey was when i found the knowledge and power to control my life"

03/04"i do the things i do because i like to learn and experience every aspect life gives, whether its wrong or right"

03/04"my philosophy is pretty deep. i get alot out of life and enjoy every moment because of it. pretty much why i'm always happy"

03/05"you tried your best, but i guess your best wasn't good enough. cuz here we are back where we were before."

03/08"Life is too serious. Stay a kid for as long as you can, because when you grow up, you forget how to be one."

03/08"Also, you're gonna live most of your life as an adult, so might as well live it up now."

03/23"Heroes get remembered, but Legends never die."

_dont steal them and think they are yours.
...more to come(:

Haha, I guess.

Today, I went on Facebook to find that my little brother had messed with my profile. He wrote on my status that I'm a piece of shit, I have no life, and several other nasty and perverted things. Underneath, it said 26 of my friends liked this. I'm new to Facebook. So far I have 26 friends. - FML

So like this one girl is getting hella annoying I swear. I just want to smack some sense into her! I can name so many people that doesn't like her at all. But others that think that she's so great. Okay don't take me wrong she has a great personality and all that, it's just how she comes out. She gives a great first impression, but the worst lasting one. Gahhd she needs to just not play around like this. She feels sorrie for herself? I feel sorrie for her, she seems desperate yet needy at the same time. omg girl, you really need to back off already. ohBTW-myspace and facebook is funny.

Deng Youtube

That copyright rule, that you can use anyones music.
I hate it, So I'm uploading the video here.
It's just clips with me and my friends.
Bestfriends, Regular Friends, New Friends. (all kinds!)

Enjoy.

What could I do.

What makes me feel better through the days.
Spending time with friends and forgetting what's wrong.
And eating my life away <3 esp. spicy food!



...(: yeah. *sigh
"Cause I'm so sick of love songs, so tired of tears"


Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom.I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. -FML

Doesn't Work For Me

my poker face.

I can't sleep early anymore.
It just never works out.
Just thinking about you<3
hahaha NOT kidding fools.

(aim) renabobena10
(msn) renabobena10@hotmail.com

Full Moon

(: mhmm, yessiree!

do you know whats funny.
when you call someone a "bitch" on aim
then sign off right after, lol

do you know whats funnier.
when you put yourself anonymous
and talk shiet to them, lmao

so much hatred; what happened to world peace!?
good stuff.

Happy Half Bday Me!

oh shuddup, there's always a reason to celebrate.
so from today it came out to be...

_long morning: "studying"
_webcam fun on study breaks
_sleeping in political science class
_watching a video in drama class
_hot guy in my class, stares at me in the library
_playing with the white board
_learning italian with thee atehs
_chipotle food; yummiee(:
_fig garden village walk
_longs drugs to buy candy
_find my teacher shopping at longs drugs
_shooting candy in our mouths and catching them
_chase a kidd in the parking lot, take my breath away
_iphone pictures in the car
_"pull my hair" ?!
_nervous game
_party in the group rooms(:
_more webcam fun


sounds like a pretty good day(:

Daylight Savings Time

I hate it, I lost one hour of sleep.
MIDTERMS -- hate that more.
im tired and cranky ahhaha(:


enjoy this song...

First Week of March

(whoever reads this shizz in effin amazing. lol

I'm telling you guys that...

" i'm feeling this week is gonna be the most spontaneous one yet(: "

_just because so from sun-sat imma tell you why and update you guys.
*spontaneous--something i wouldnt do, or dont usually do, hear, say, all those five sense we have.(SPONTANEOUS)will be written on it.

&ohBTW: all my aim/msn/facebook/myspace/meebo convos are spontaneous you have no idea, cant write all of the down. (: LMAO

Sunday:

Holy Supper -- i was practically at church at morning/afternoon. yes i feel blessed, lmao ... people laugh when i say that. then after, of course we had picture time. for some reason purple was the color scheme of that day, i was wearing a purple scarf so it was all good. LOTS of the pictures i took on my camera looked very pro and i looveedd it.
Then went out and about to stores -- costco was pretty fun, and found out that the 8g ipod touch is the same as the 8g ipod nano. crazzie right?! i know. and went to chuckecheese, ahah cuhz my mom went to biglots and i saw my friend royce there(SPONTANEOUS).and went to hollywood vids the home then had to go back to winco for more stuff and saw sherina and her family. out of the bleww and yeahhhh.

_____________________________________

Monday:
Class -- pretty easy and simple i swear. taking notes and piano class i had my midterm and it was a piece of cake so i had time to spare so i called up susana and hung out with her and ingrid. i miss that girl . got the talking and went outside to the fountain. there was a bunch of kids in a tour and the lady went up to us and said if we can be quiet but we just laughed it off. i havent laughed soo hard in a long time.
Lollicup -- oh johnny he learned my name ahha. he requested i should get the popcorn chicken so i did, had it spiccyy(: hehe. but it was good not that hot, then he told me to taste this really hot sauce(SPONTANEOUS) omg for some reason it wouldnt stop like burning. like i could take it and all but it wouldnt stop lmaoo. then it gave me a major headache and johnny got his handy dandy first aid kit and gave me aspirin. then we were talking about balut and he was like EWWWW. its not that bad! and i met anthony, hes pretty cool, fun to talk to. and he likes green skittles lmao. oh and we played quarters, i lost his 75cents and i lots like 75cents too from johnny. ugh johnny and ste7en told me to stop gambling. i dont have a problem! i just said one more time lmao. the we watched step up two and dumb and dumber on the tv. talked much and thats pretty much it.
Kareoke -- gosh i havent done this in the longest time! im really bad at this. i mess up a a lot, but yeahh. i just really want to play this on the piano(:

_____________________________________

Tuesday:

Morning/class --uberr boring i swear. tony was making fun of me cuhz i was in the library and he had no class. hes dumb ahha nah. but it was chill. class was only fun in drama. dayum teacher. so yeah that was done and over with at three. then met up with ateh arianne, brent and kuya marick. just search the web, got some tacos. UGH there was something in my taco:/ that wasnt on the menu. then this asian girl told us to be quiet -- the SECOND time i was told to be quiet this week lmao. went to buchanan to pick up sam(SPONTANEOUS). while walking to the car i just started dancing, ahha it was pretty fun. then cracking up jokes in the car and back to state. oh did webcamming with george and sunnie. lmao nuff sed.

_____________________________________

Wednesday:
Morning -- i got shushed again by kham lmao (third time this week) and hung out with susana in the morning cuhz her class was cancelled and saw tony at the student union. he really didnt want to go to class lol, so we talked for a while then he left. and today is joseph's bday!(: ommgg me and kham were sitting in the library then this guy came and the other guy that was sitting by us the whole time, we found out hes gay. how -- "like omg you can totally tell" lol (SPONTANEOUS) foreaall
Afternoon -- was suppose to go to sam's track meet but didnt so chilled at the student union. i la la love seyla and justin, david, and sos was down there. then tony came along. then saw george. then i saw mike. and molina. then steven, kevin, and jessica came there. hahahah(: it was tiigght. fun laughs like seriously. steven kept picking me up lmao. and i just talked for george a bit. then with tony, but he thought i was stalking his brother. psh I LIKED HIS SHOES. lol and mike came without giving me boba. darn him. so i got one when i went home and i see him again. OH and i won 50cents from quarters, ha i won it back. booyah!

_____________________________________

Thursday:

All day -- i basically spend the whole day with george, then went to city and hung out with them. so the plan was morning with george at state. nahhh didnt work out so we went to city because i wanted to see my love patricia. so we went to city and i kept on calling she wont pick up aha. so chilled there for a while and saw bat(:, johnny, addy, jimmy, and yeah otherrs. then patrica was done with class with aaron and joseph! ahh group reunited from junior year. so chilled more at city and sunny came and we all decided to get some drinks, so we went to teaser twisers(?) ahah iono this tea place. left that place lol went to subway but it was packed, so went to little cesars and ate on top of aarons truck lmao. then aaron and joseph had to go so we went to lollicup and i kinda drove georges biggo car; eh bad experience. lost to johnny with quarters(fifty cents) ughhh. then made some youtube vids on georges account, and something went down. then went to the mall. so like i liked this shirt, and patricia liked her shirt... and it went on and george payed for some of it -_-. i kinda feel bad, but hey... ugh nvm. then off to state with patricia and took her home. LONG day -- worth it? yeah kinda. (everythingwasSPONTANEOUS)

_____________________________________

Friday:

Morning: So all morning I just wanted to get finished with my class and see my friends. but i know ditching class is not the way to go lmao. so yeahh, went to class then at the free speech area there was this preacher guy all doing his stuff. hahah things he said that were funny was like, "girls close your legs, thats what the guys want" and like this one person was like "stop yelling at me" haha(: it was funnie... but day went by then went to lollicup before i went to bj's. i saw anthony(: talked to him for a bit. and controlled myself and didnt play quarters lol. and then i was off to seee thee friends
Bestfriends reunited: how does the song go, "reunited and it feels so good" ahhaha. it was though. my whole junior year came back except lucy but it was all good at BJ'S. aaron, joseph, jovan(the three amigos) and part of the fantastic four me, susie and patty. ahhh so much fun. we cracked so many jokes, took endless pictures. the waiter was funnie -- she kept on messing up on our stuff and kept on studdderrring. we sang happy belated bday to joseph, and gossiped much haha. then off to the mall. we got in trouble at urban for taking pictures but that didnt stop us. then we went to other stores, massages at brookstore, fun sunglasses at forever, and we stayed at the apple store til the end. took youtube vids and much pictures. we said our goodbyes and it was depart we go
Happy Birthday Crystal: I had to miss my friend's tony performance for this hahah, ish all good(: it was cold outside but i kept on moving to not get cold. the valet parking guy was hilarious kept on running and i kinda ran after him ahaa. chilled for a bit at cheesecake, and everyone came. change of plans it took to long, went to bjs to ask how long, it was an hour, decided to go dennys across the street, but then decided to go red robin cuhz we had reservations, but then it was the wrong one so we went to the dennys at blackstone. ughh soo much. but at least i saw crystal. HAAPPPYBIRTHDAY<3(allwasSPONTANEOUS)

_____________________________________

Saturday:
YESSS GOT MY WIRELESS INTERNET BACK !
-and-
got my charger for my laptop that i can use again!
OMGGGAHHHD o.O

Happy one year Lollicup(:

First woke up early in the morning for church.
I was there for the whole morning (: i feel blessed lol.
Then met up with thee cousins and kuya Marick at thee mall.
Kinda looked around forever 21 for a while,
i saw this cute shirt >.< but didnt buy it. (sigh) -- had to go.

The whole day i was waiting for this, going to Lollicup.
[eventhough i went there yesterday with Bat hehe]
One because i get to see the mc(ste7en) && i want a shirt lol.
But i wasnt the first 100customer, darn johnny. lmao kidding.
ish all gewd -- the workers were having a hard time learning my name.
Chilled there for a while; talked laughed and all that shizz.
Said byee to everyone, gave last hug to ste7en and got me shirt.
I know i didnt win, but i am a VALUABLE CUSTOMER haha.


went to target for fun, then costco.
unplanned and random day(: but i liked it<3

What chu talking about!?

kevin r: you wanna die?
me: sometimes
kevin r.: what?! that was a good answer, it made me think and got all confused.
LMAO. (the day we got free starbucks)



aim conversation
PrINChArMIN pnoi: Yup..what are you studying? Boyfriendcology? Haha
renabobena10: lol i failed that twice
renabobena10: ahhaha
renabobena10: im taking single and not looking class.(:
PrINChArMIN pnoi: Hahaha
PrINChArMIN pnoi: Your a boyfriend drop out
renabobena10: hahaha. thats funnie.

Just one of those days

KUYA RONNIE: so who do you like?
ME: why do you want to know -_-
KUYA RONNIE: because i'm your big brother, i want to be there for you.
ME: so like if i want you to beat someone up for me because they hurt me so much would you do it? since you are like my big brother and all.
KUYA RONNIE: yes
ME: omg really?
KUYA RONNIE: well you have to have a good reason.
ME: awhh, you suck... nevermind (LOL)

Another Friday that was pretty fun. Hung out with my Kuya Ronnie. Bumped the power ranger song in the car(: you know! hahah. We went to Lollicup and met ste7en who plays GREAT guitar and sings really good. he likes request lol(: then we left to the mall and saw jony and i met kyrie for the first time. i saw this shirt at urban that had a huge heart and said tokyo on the bottom it was pretty cute, and see through lol(: we took pictures at the apple store...

You got a friend in me.

Eddie Yummie Banana Pineapple aka Yellow Pina

That is the name of my very best friend. Despite of our arrangement of not seeing each other everyday like in high school we still have the time to call each other. Whatever situation it is, we are always there for each other… well he’s mostly there for me, I have more problems lol(: I know he doesn’t give much feedback, and I know I talk a lot -- but we have a great relationship. I can’t believe that I just met him two years ago, and it feels like I have known him forever.

Finding out that he’s going to Fresno Pacific, I am super happy for him. That is one of the best schools in Fresno and he deserves to get a great education. The only thing that sucks is he’s not gonna be at state with me. All I have to do is hope for the best for him, he’s a great guy and I think he’s going to do great in the future.

Well we had our normal conversations, but we started out with me expressing like crazzie. He was kinda speechless, but who wouldn’t be when all I can say is “guys are jerks”. I don’t really mean that -- but I didn’t know how to put it really. Anyways, he made me understand other things that kinda relate to my situation. He made put myself in someone else’s position, how I would feel if I were them. And he asked some questions that I recognized that I studdered in. Why cant I answer a simple question? Because the answer wasn’t simple as I thought, meaning I couldn’t answer something that I truly thought that was right, or true. And another thing is being a pessimist. I thought being one was always negative, but he made me realize it really wasn’t. The deal is it’s better to be a pessimist and think the bad things can happen so you won’t get discouraged when it does, because you expected the unexpected. Then you are “happy happy happy” -- yeah we exaggerated on that.

It’s the way we talk to each other. It’s not the same with others, I don’t do the usual routine conversations like “how’s your day, blah blah blah”. We put what is out there, we talk like we have a reason to. And we make each conversation worth it like the last one. It’s just different with him. I said he was like my little brother that is taller than me, this kind of relationship is something I never want to lose. I hope everyone has a person like this, because they are worth every second of your time.

A day I dont want to remember.

I woke up one in the morning to be on myspace and talk to my peoples on aim and msn. I know it sounds really lame, but I couldn't fall asleep. My conversations went on -- and it doesn't end well. How am i feeling? Well, I'm not mad... I'm just sick && tired. I'm sick of crying over spilt milk, I'm tired of not expecting the unexpected. I put my hopes so high, so I can see it crash all down. I didn't want anyone to cheer me up, I didn't want to laugh or smile. I just wanted someone to listen to me, and let me cry. Let me be.

My friend Bat, that I barely met a couple months ago helped me out. He was listening when I just complained and whined. He related to me, so I can understand what's happening. He told me I was blindsighted. He showed me what I couldn't see. He made me look at it as an opportunity to learn. It's not because I liked the attention that someone was listening to me, when no one else was there. It's the fact that I have the trust in him to keep this, and respect what I have to say. Does he care -- well i believe yes. It's not because he didn't leave when i poured my heart out, it's not because he was there when no one else was there to listen to me, it's because he knows how I feel. You can't relate to a person until you have experienced the same thing.

On the other hand Leo helped me with another situation. The situation of looking at someone, when I thought it was something more. I couldn't figure out myself; but it shows that I just missed that person who was always there to fix and broken heart. He made me understand that; and well... I took his word for it. But last night was the night I just wanted to hold that other persons hand and hear his voice say again that "everything will be alright", he never backed down on saying that.

I spent my day with only three hours of sleep, waking up in the morning crying and sleeping with tears running down my face. So I start blogging on blogspot with something that impacts me so much. Let's call this the learning experience. What I learned is not everyone is what you expect to be, and listen to what others have to say -- cause most of the time... they're right. They see what you can't see. It sucks when it's too late. People have wants and needs; and when you don't meet their expectations... it doesn't cut it for them. And this shows once again -- i'm not good enough. But it shows; that i deserve better. So here's my first blog, now you know more about me, CONGRATS. i guess.